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Marsha Means, MA
Looking back across the years of my life, I know it is not by accident that I now help women hurting from the pain marital infidelity brings. This is the path that brought me here….
Each of us has a story to tell; a story made up of all the big and little things that have happened to us in life. As we grow up and move into adulthood, we all endure the inevitable emotional wounding that comes with life on planet Earth. And just as inevitably, these wounds generate responses and behaviors in us. As children, and often even as adults, we remain completely unaware of the interaction between life’s circumstances and our own emotional development. Metaphorically, it’s as if from the moment we are born, our stories spin reams of yarn—some of it plush and soft, some coarse and rough to the touch, some fine and delicate—but all of it spun from the moments, the times, and the days of our lives.
Have you just received the most painful news of your life from your husband? Have you just discovered that your partner, lover and best friend has a sexual addiction? Are you feeling lonely, rejected, shamed, angry, hurt, misunderstood and betrayed? We want you to know more and more women are discovering this, and you are not alone!
Katherine is a woman, just like you, who experienced a very similar journey. Her husband’s addiction to pornography and masturbation was a huge part of their marriage of more than thirty years. Complicating things further, after 15 years his sexual addiction secretly spiraled out of control into eight years of affairs, internet sex chats, phone sex, same sex attraction, ultimately leading to the illegal downloading of child pornography and his arrest.
Coach Carin I grew up on a farm in Africa. For various reasons, my family of origin could not provide me with the support I needed to develop as an emotionally, spiritually and physically healthy child. In order to survive growing up in an emotionally dishonest, shame-based and controlling family, I formed a bond with my pets, dolls and indigenous play mates. The only two emotions I often experienced in my family were rage and sadness, and the only emotion I can remember feeling was fear.
Jodi’s passion for helping women heal the pain of their partner’s sexual addiction began when she discovered her husband’s use of porn and grappled with his accompanying sexual and emotional anorexia and the searing pain it produced in her life. Her quest to find a way to rekindle the joy in her marriage led her to AWHJ in 2009.
Jodi’s coaching experience includes certification as a Celebrate Calm Coach where she helped children and families deal with the challenges of ADD/ADHD; her role as a volunteer Success Coach with Touchpoint Connection, a program for high school students; five years as a middle school youth group leader; and raising four wonderful sons to adulthood, and step parenting her husband’s two children through their teen s. She also worked for 17 years in a university setting where she helped students find their own path in a large institution.
Now Jodi helps hurting partners of sex addicts find their way, which she says “…is both a privilege and a blessing for me. “ Together, Jodi and her husband continue to work to fully restore the joy in their marriage. “The hope I now have for my marriage fuels in me a passion to bring hope and encouragement to other couples. Isaiah 61:3 expresses it well: “To care for the needs of all who mourn in Zion, give them bouquets of roses instead of ashes, messages of joy instead of news of doom, a praising heart instead of a languid spirit,” The Message.